My name is Tanya and I am a 39-year-old wife and mother to my beautiful Sofia Rayne. I live in Rocklin, California and work as a medical social worker/psychotherapist. I have dedicated my life to helping others as I have always believed it is my true calling. I have suffered a lot in my life, which is what drove me to pursue my passion for helping others. I have worked so hard to have the life that I have and to surpass addiction and mental health issues.
I have been in the fitness industry since 2007. Fitness and health have always been my passion. I always thought if I took care of myself, I would have less illness later in life. I have always been an active person and used to play sports when I was younger. I was always the star athlete, so bodybuilding came easily to me. I was enjoying being a new mom and sharing my life with my husband and daughter. I enjoyed working and helping others.
I was hesitant about getting this jab, but I believed in science. I believed in our medical system. I knew it wasn’t perfect, but I trusted it somewhat. Both my husband and I work in the medical field and were considered first line essential workers. I thought I was doing the right thing by protecting the elderly and sick.
I know a lot about the chemicals in our food and our whole system, but I didn’t know the same horrible things were in our vaccine system. I remember when I had my daughter Sofia in 2020. She was born premature and weighed only three pounds, yet they wanted to give her something like five vaccines all at once. I advocated for her and told them to piss off, that I am not doing that to a three-pound baby. I have protected her since day one, and so I get mad at myself that I didn’t protect myself.
I got my first jab in January, 2021. I had no symptoms afterwards other than a sore arm that went away after a few days. At the time I was breastfeeding and had asked several doctors that I trusted and they all said it was safe. Exactly six months later, when I stopped breastfeeding, my HELL began. I did not have a period, so when it came back, it was not the same. I developed severe pelvic pain and pain while urinating. My periods were dark and heavy, and full of clots. I would collapse to the floor screaming in pain. I lay awake at night feeling like I had a UTI that didn’t go away (if any of you had one, you know it’s painful). Prior to this I always had bladder sensitivity but NEVER like this. My periods were always normal with mild cramping and I JUST had a baby.
Finally, after a month of crying day and night, contemplating suicide because nothing took it away, I saw a urogynecologist. He did his evaluation and tested my bladder, and the tests came back normal. He also did a cystoscopy inside my bladder and that was normal, too, and showed no signs of cancer. He said it looked like I have a condition called interstitial cystitis. Additionally, he said I have extremely tight pelvic floor muscles and gave me injections in my pelvic floor. They were so horribly painful I would come home and bleed everywhere and my pain was even worse.
I sought out a pelvic floor PT and paid on my own because insurance didn’t pay. She was amazing, and told me she didn’t think I had IC but just tight muscles. She helped me a lot, and gave me some pain relief. When the trigger point injections were complete, I had a drug called DMSO inserted into my bladder for 15 minutes. I would sit there in tears because the pain was so great. I was so emotionally traumatized and the doctors and nurses were so cold to me. I felt so alone. I would come home with no relief and a burning urethra. By the grace of God they gave me as a sample a medication called Uribel and it finally eased some discomfort.
I was still working and being a mom, but I had to say goodbye to working out. I didn’t suspect the jab yet, but I did not get the booster because of my inflammatory response to something and I didn’t want to make it worse. Six months go by of this torture (bladder treatments, PT, etc.) My periods got worse, and I could feel things moving inside me. My stomach was also a mess. Foods I used to eat and enjoy, I could not eat. I could not drink. I was allergic to everything. I could not socialize. When people asked me how I was, I was miserable and didn’t know how to explain this odd disease.
Finally, I saw another urogynecologist and my OBGYN. I told him my symptoms of looking pregnant and the pelvic swelling. He ordered imaging which revealed an ovarian cyst and fluid, meaning that I likely had endometriosis. I have never had this disease or a cyst in my life. I was told I may never have kids and I need surgery to excise/remove the endometriosis.
Aside from painful periods and horrible bladder and stomach pain, I have numbness in my jabbed arm that came out of nowhere. My entire left side of my body now gets swollen. I had X-rays, which found I have degenerative disk disease. Now, as my period pains started easing up, it moved to my neck. I returned to the PT but got no relief and was told I needed surgery. I know in my heart this is jab related because I never had a life like this.
These symptoms have greatly affected my ability to help others. I can’t have any stress due to it triggering my pain. I cannot eat normal food, and I still cannot live without all the supplements. I am happy to say that after trying Chinese medicine, my endometriosis is under control and my bladder symptoms have eased as well without surgery. Using the red light has calmed the muscles in my neck and the inflammation is finally gone. It has affected my relationship with my husband, who has been the best support for me. I don’t think I would have survived this without him. He was always there for me no matter what. He believed me and didn’t gaslight me.
I am also a victim of trauma and when I would get this pain cycle, the panic would set in and I would have a flight/fight response. I would think that I would have to live in this pain forever and the fear would choke me up. I would have nightmares and wake up in the middle of night with so much pain. Screaming and crying, sometimes shaking.
I have been to so many doctors. They all look at me like I’m crazy. No one has answers for me. They give me a diagnosis and tell me surgery or birth control is the only way to help but that there is no cure. Functional medicine doctors have been a lot more supportive but when I brought up the jab, they quietened down.
I have been very verbal as a social worker throughout all this. I am not afraid to speak up to anyone. My family didn’t believe me at first. When I found Jab Injuries IG, that’s when my whole world changed. I realized I was not the only one. Many had it much worse, but misery is misery. I related to these stories. I felt their pain and would cry reading them. I felt like I was finally being heard, like not alone anymore. My friends all just dwindled off, one by one. But that’s life. People come and go. I made a promise to myself that I would be me, and if that scares people away, then better for me.
I lay awake at night and prayed and prayed. God, I would pray. I think I even held the crucifixion cross on my abdomen and prayed for healing. It has taken me ONE whole year to finally be free of pain. I know I am not done because it likes to come back. I take it one day at a time. I made it through today and will worry about tomorrow when it’s tomorrow.
I do have the MTHFR gene mutation, which is a gene that does not break chemicals down well, or even food. This jab turned these inflammatory genes on and wreaked havoc on my whole system. I have many autoimmune issues now but am working so hard to reverse them. I am happy to say my hair has grown back, my energy is better, my periods are more normal, and I get some pain here and there, but I have my supplements and lifestyle to continue to support methylation and detox.
I want you to know that it is possible to heal and get better. I am walking proof of it. As a therapist, I tell people what I tell myself. It is important to take the necessary steps to get better. Take action. There will be good days and bad days where depression hits you and you can barely function, but you must keep going. We can all have the doom and gloom days, but don’t live there. We become what we believe we are. Our minds are so powerful and our thoughts can shape our future. I heard one of my favorite motivational speakers the other day say, “Don’t make permanent decisions based on a temporary situation.”
You won’t be in this place forever. Grieve the life you had and embrace a new one. A better one. Every time you go through a tough time, when you get to the other side, you will meet a new you. A better you. You will continue to grow and learn. Pain moves people to do what they otherwise would not do. Maybe I had to go through this so that I can help others too.
We have to think differently about all this. It’s so unfair we had to go through this and how our lives have changed. But those changes also change us. Keep moving forward, stay curious, ask questions, speak up, choose to stay humble and positive. I promise you there is another side and when you get there, you will look back and say, “Wow. I did it!” You will have one hell of a story to tell your grandkids when you get old someday!